How to Cope with Your Headache

December 10, 2017

Here are the five stages of your headache, as told by grief.

Stage 1: Denial

You wake up drastically and dramatically. It’s nothing. Just a little bit of tension near the noggin, no need to go to a headache doctor. As soon as you set your feet on the floor you realize that today is going to be a battle. Apparently you turned vibration on in your head, and it won’t turn off. You contemplate calling in sick to work, but your pride won’t let you. You’re going to win this. Nothing is wrong. You can’t find the Ibuprofen. It’s also easy to google “headache doctor” but we don’t need that. 

Stage 2: Anger

You’re currently sitting in traffic trying to drop off your kids. They’re screaming in the back, and the car in front of you is going 5 miles under the speed limit. To top that off it isn’t a vibration in your head anymore, it’s a throbbing sensation. At this point it has become increasingly unbearable. You can’t wait to get out of your car and just slam your door. But be careful, because the sound of a slammed door can actually make your headache worse. If you saw a headache doctor right now, you would actually be more mad at him for not seeing you sooner.

Stage 3: Bargaining

Never again will you take your daily life for granted. You could think this is karma getting at you. You look to the ceiling as you’re thinking about everything bad thing you have done. “Why me..Why me?” you start to scream. Unfortunately you can’t scream it because talking makes your headache worse. So you think it really loud to compensate. You’re thinking of what you did the day before that brought this monstrosity in your head, and promise yourself never to do it again. Like not even be in the same place again. It’s getting that bad. “I’ll stop binge watching Netflix if that will make this headache go away,” you continue as it in fact doesn’t go away. The thought of going to a headache doctor comes across your aching mind.

Stage 4: Depression

It’s been hours. Nothing has cheered you up. You’re constantly looking down, and the sunlight is literally (or figuratively) burning your eyes. You can’t even remember what happiness feels like. It seems you can’t look forward to anything in the near future, because it is all masked by this pain in your head. “Siri, call a headache doctor now,” you mumble.

Stage 5: Acceptance (to go to a Headache Doctor)

This is your life now. You have come to terms that you will always, and forever, have a headache.

That is until you come see us at Restoration Health! We’re your headache doctor that is going to save the day. You can accept that.

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